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When you have lost a loved one, you live in a dark place for a while. You are the beneficiary of many kind gestures: condolences, meals, phone calls, cards, and more. Often, you go through the motions and say thank you, smile, and retreat back into your personal world of sadness. Other times, these gestures of kindness warm your heart, make you smile, or cry.
Here are a few random acts of kindness that made my day while I was grieving. These are stories from my book Good Grief.
Doing something kind for someone else makes you feel good. It requires reaching outside of yourself and focusing on someone else in need. I have found it’s a doorway out of grief, one step at a time, one kindness at a time. The kindness can be as simple as a smile. You’ll find you feel less gloomy and sad as each action occurs. Intentional acts of kindness are good, too. They provide you with more time away from your sadness and grief as you spend time in preparation and initiation of the “kindness” act.
Surprise an elderly family member, a neighbor who is lonely, or a shut-in with a small bouquet of flowers. OR — surprise yourself with a lovely bouquet and practice self-kindness. You could even buy a bunch of flowers and make 2 bouquets — one for you and one to give away.
Spend time chatting, watching a movie, reading a book, or crafting with a neighbor. My neighbor Mable and I talk politics, religion, days of yore, and the present time. We laugh a lot.
Leave a goodie bag, basket of fruit, or baked goods for someone in need. Ring the doorbell and leave. Mable is also my taste-tester for any new recipes.
These are Ziploc bags containing: shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, bar of soap, small tissues, and a card with a statement of hope. Deliver them to FeedNC in Mooresville.
The crocheted nests are made of regular yarn, 2 strands of any color, and made into small, medium, and large sizes.
From February 21 – March 21, the Lake Norman / Mooresville Exchange Club has adopted this project in celebration of its 30th Anniversary. Members are focused on spreading kindness and love throughout the community using the number 30. You do not have to be a member to participate!
Cheryl A. Barrett, RN, MSN, NC-BC, is a retired nurse with 30-plus years in a variety of settings: clinical bedside in ICU, staff educator, academic instructor both didactic and clinical, supervisor, home care education, editorial director of a nursing magazine and is a board certified integrative nurse coach.
In 2018 she published Good Grief: Strategies for Building Resilience and Supporting Transformation, inspired by the death of her husband. She won the American Journal of Nursing Book of the Year, 2018 in the category of Palliative Care and Hospice for her book. She is currently creating a companion workbook for those experiencing grief and loss.
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