The Gentlemen’s Corner W/ Colin Furcht – Gentlemen’s Guide to Finding Happiness

Generally speaking, Men are givers, fixers and doers. This means, sometimes, their own needs and wants may not be the focus at any given point in time. We are protectors and providers first.  This is fine, as long as they are getting what they need out of life and in their relationships. Being aware of what YOU need to be happy is an important skill that some of us may take a long time to figure out. Let’s take a walk and talk through it…

What is the meaning of happiness?

Before we get too deep in the weeds, we need define what makes us happy. Right? How do know where you want to be if you don’t know where you are? Self awareness is an extremely important quality that all men need to be focused on for their own well being. Happiness, while a very general emotion, can have many different aspects.

1. What do you do for you? Has life become a little ‘Groundhog Day-ish?’ Are you able to focus on yourself or are you being pulled in many different directions? You know the story about being on a plane and making sure your oxygen mask is on before you put one on others? You can’t be there for others if you aren’t taking care of you. We’ve covered healthy habits in other stories, but this is a big piece of it. Make sure you take time for you. Maybe it’s time for a new hobby, a sport or even volunteering? Where did I hear that one before…

2. Do you have time to do what you need to do? If your schedule is not your own, you may need to put some down time on your calendar each week. It’s as simple as blocking off lunch or the gym. Managing your schedule, being ok with saying NO and just focusing on yourself here and there. I assure you this will bring you happiness and peace in your day to day.
3. Are you surrounded by positive influences? No one likes a pessimist. If you are surrounded by the ‘glass is half empty’ people in your life, it may be time for a change. You become the people you associate with. Find positive, healthy, encouraging people to spend your time with. They are out there, I promise. Hopefully a few more will be after reading this as well!

4. What is on your bucket list? This should be the fun part of the exercise. Do you set goals every year? Do you actually have things written down or on a vision board? Just like any other process, you need a plan. This could be at work, within your community or just around the house. Setting realistic and attainable goals will give you a sense of accomplishment once you meet them. It won’t hurt to throw a few crazy ones in there, you just never know! Oh and it’s ok to share your successes with your brothers as well. They may even help encourage you to do more.
5. How do you juggle the needs of others with your own? This is where the givers and protectors have a hard time. If you are the go-to guy within your family or circle of friends, you need to set boundaries. While reciprocity is probably not why you are the way you are, it doesn’t hurt to get some help from others. It’s ok to ask. Being honest about what you need, especially in a relationship, is key to your overall success.
6. Being able to identify what is stopping you from being happy. This is where your mental health comes in. Having a friend or a professional in your life who can help you navigate life is extremely important. There is no shame is raising your hand and asking for help. Realizing where and how you need to make changes will be the first step in finding the happiness you so deserve. Do not minimize how important this is. You only go around once!

Where do I start?

We probably could add a ton more things that make us happy. At the end of the day, we each have our own lists, goals, challenges and people in our lives the impact our ability to find and be truly happy. Your job, your health, your relationships and your past are all influences to finding true happiness. Taking the time to evaluate, being honest with yourself and committing to making changes are all what a true Gentleman needs to focus on. Having the desire and following through are the most important steps. Remember, it’s ok to rely on your Brotherhood!

Colin Furcht- BRO Beard Products CEO

Colin has been a long time Lake Norman resident and has been very active in the community. From Commissioner to founding the Lake Norman Lighted Christmas Boat Parade to now a featured Author and small business owner! His desire is to bring men together and encourage them to reach out. He has always said, ‘look out for yourselves and each other.’ All men need a Brotherhood. www.brobeardproducts.shop