The Gentlemen’s Corner with Colin Furcht: The Gentlemen’s Guide to Men’s Wellness

Every few weeks, I sit down in front of my computer and struggle with the next mind blowing, massively impacting article. I am so grateful for this platform and appreciate the feedback and support I have received. This week, I’m going back to basics. Men’s Wellness. That means a lot of things to us men nowadays. I Googled the ‘Top Challenges Men Face Today.’ This is what I found: Mental Health, Identity and Role Confusion, Social Isolation, Work-Life Balance, Societal Pressure, Violence and Aggression and Changing Relationships. Whew! There is a lot there. I obviously will not be able to address these all today. I’ll do my best to put some real-life examples out there to encourage you all to find answers from your trusted friends, professionals and your brotherhood. Every one of these is important.

What issues impact you most?

Every one of us has a different but probably similar list like the one above. Some deal with a few of these more than others. Identifying and addressing your top 3-4 should be your first priority. I’ve touched on this before, being a man today is very different than our father’s generation and especially our grandfather’s generation. Take the time to acknowledge the areas you struggle with and look to someone for help.

1. Mental Health. Countless books have been written about this topic. Not just for men but for women as well. This is a topic that shows up in our daily lives more than we probably want to admit. Because of the plethora of other issues we deal with daily, our mental health usually takes a hit more than not. Be self-aware about how you are feeling, how you react to the good and bad, and how you interact with people around you. Signs as obvious as isolation or as hard to spot as lack of sleep can all be triggers. Find ways to cope through exercise, prayer, therapy or mediation. Any or all of these will positively impact your direction.
2. Work Life Balance. Especially for those with families, this can certainly be a constant challenge. Making time to provide for your family while making yourself ready for the thing that life throws at us every day is key. Identifying the need to divide and concur all of the things we deal with every day is a challenging task. Take time for yourself. Make sure you can find 30 minutes or so every day to disconnect in whatever way makes sense to you.

3. Relationship. Unless you’re like my folks and have been together for almost 60 years, there’s a good chance you have been through a few different relationships in your life. Not only is there stress once that ends with that person, there’s also the change of your circle, your family and who you spend your time with now. That is absolutely a tough pill to swallow. We, as humans, thrive on consistency. When the person you are with or the friends you hang out with change, it can be hard. Starting over isn’t just without that one person but possibly with a whole circle as well. This is where having a strong Brotherhood comes into play. Your brothers should always stand by you, regardless of the changes. Be that constant to a brother who may be going through those changes as well.

4. Societal Pressure. This is a very tricky one for me. I’m old school. My Dad worked and my Mom stayed home. Today, you, as the Dad may be the one to stay home and your spouse works. You may not even be married, and the dating world has its own set of challenges. Do I hold the door open, do I pay for dinner, what if the woman in my life makes more than I do? I’m not here to tell you what to do in all these scenarios. All I am doing is acknowledging things are different. I would say that you need to find someone who shares your vision and is willing to work with you in all aspects of life. Regardless, if you are 30 or 50, it doesn’t matter what you decide, but make sure you are both on the same page. Admittedly, especially as we get older, finding that person has its challenges. History is a bear sometimes. Knowing that no relationship is perfect and that everyone has their wants and needs, hopefully opens communication early to avoid issues after.   

Feel better?

I may have opened Pandora’s Box here but sometimes I believe we need to have the hard conversations. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized the importance of speaking up. Good or bad, we all must feel comfortable asking for help, righting a wrong or extending a hand to someone who needs us. The peer pressure of high school sticks with us sometimes. Don’t give into it. People will respect you more if you are forthcoming with your thoughts, as long as you are not attacking someone or their ideals. Being that person, they know they can come to, is just as important as raising your hand when you need help. Being a man today doesn’t mean you need to always pound your chest, it’s ok to let others take the lead. Just remember to always be true to yourself. It’s more important now than ever to…

Take care of yourselves and your brotherhood!

Colin Furcht- BRO Beard Products CEO

Colin has been a long time Lake Norman resident and has been very active in the community. From Commissioner to founding the Lake Norman Lighted Christmas Boat Parade to now a featured Author and small business owner! His desire is to bring men together and encourage them to reach out. He has always said, ‘look out for yourselves and each other.’ All men need a Brotherhood. www.brobeardproducts.shop